I know that I can easily turn things around

Turnarounds get told as a single moment. The decision, the morning it changed, the phone call. That is the shape a story needs, and it is almost never the shape the thing had while it was happening.

In real time it is a run of dull Tuesdays where you took the slightly better option instead of the familiar one, and none of them felt like a turning point, and about eleven of them in a row began to add up. The dramatic version only becomes available later, once there is something to point back at.