I will not replay situations in my mind that upset or hurt me.

The shower argument is undefeated. In there you are articulate, the timing is perfect, and the other person has no counter — which is precisely the problem, because they aren't present and therefore can't concede.

Rehearsing a hurt has the texture of preparation. It feels like getting ready. But there is no meeting scheduled, nobody will ever hear the good version, and the body meanwhile is running the whole confrontation as though it were happening now, at eleven at night, with the heart rate to match.

The useful question isn't whether you were right. It is whether this particular scene is ever going to be played anywhere but here.