I give up holding things against others.

Holding something against a person is an active grip, not a state. It has to be renewed. There is a small refresh that happens every time their name comes up, a re-reading of the file to check the charge still stands.

Most people never notice they are doing it, because it takes about two seconds and feels like memory rather than effort.

Giving it up requires no conversation with them at all. It is more like closing a tab you have had open so long you stopped seeing it, and then noticing, over the following weeks, that the machine runs slightly cooler.