My spouse loves and accepts me just as I am.

You find out about acceptance on your worst mornings rather than your best. Feverish, unbearable, snapping at everyone, and someone still brings toast cut into triangles because that is how you like it.

Acceptance gets mistaken for approval. It isn't the same thing. They may find several aspects of you genuinely annoying and have simply decided those aspects are not up for negotiation.

That is a better deal than approval, which can be withdrawn on performance.

There is some part of yourself you are still bracing for them to object to. There is a fair chance they stopped objecting years ago and never mentioned it.