All the bad days are there for us to discover ourselves and to be the right person.

What gets discovered is more practical than spiritual. That you need eight hours or you are not yourself. That there are two people you call and the rest are for other purposes. That you cope better with work than without it, or else the exact reverse.

Plain domestic facts, and they are the ones a life gets organised around afterwards.

None of it has to be found now, and none of it has to justify anything. People simply tend to come out the far side knowing their own operating conditions better than they went in.