You’ll be proud of yourself when these days are gone.

Pride works backwards. Nobody in the middle of a difficult year feels impressive. They feel tired, and slightly ashamed of how tired they are.

Then a year or two later you come across old messages you sent during it, and you barely recognise the person writing them, and what surprises you is not how bad it was but how steadily you kept answering. The appointments made. The shifts covered. The replies sent at midnight.

You do not have to feel any of that now. It is not available yet. It is only being stored.